why did i just eat all of that….bc its what i do while im trying to study, because i already felt bad about myself so why not make myself feel worse.
i cant believe i just did that. thats the first time in 7 months. This is not okay, not okay at all. what is happening to me. i cant let his coming home put me down the drain. after tomorrow (because i have too much to do tomorrow) I am cleaning out the bad shit i bought for fun for him being home and not even having them as an option in my house. 90% clean house. This is it, i cant do this to myself. I feel like crying, not even when i went out and ate a huge dinner out have i felt this bad. Im sure it also has something to do with the fact that i have 49 minutes to write 2000+ words. i just want to lay with my husband.